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ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 8 days ago

Give me some good ones

lemmy.world

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Give me some good ones

lemmy.world

ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 8 days ago
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  • klay1@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Among everybody here, you have the most potential to learn something.

    • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      I’ve been told that a few times…

  • vaionko@sopuli.xyz
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    7 days ago

    • PixelPinecone@lemmy.today
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      4 days ago

      This made me laugh. Thank you

      • vaionko@sopuli.xyz
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        4 days ago

        Good to hear my cyanide & happiness obsession bring happiness for someone

  • BrickEater@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    What in interesting use of free will

  • squaresinger@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    I don’t have one in English, but I have some in German for those who understand.

    My Granddad had a female coworker that was higher in rank than him. He would always greet her with “Meine Allerwerteste”. It’s a word play because “Meine Werteste” is equivalent to a very formal version of “my dear”. “Aller” is a superlative form, so basically “My very dearest”. But “Mein Allerwertester” (so the male form of what he used) means “my ass”.

    The other one is to use terminology like “Er versucht immer sein Bestes zu geben” (“He always tries to give his best”). In Austria, you are legally allowed to ask for a work testimony from your employer when you are looking for a new job. There is some legislation that prohibits negative speech in these work testimonies so that your employer cannot make you look bad in front of your potential new employer (which makes the whole concept pretty useless, but it is what it is). So to get around that, employers adopted a kind of “secret” code where e.g. “tries to” means “fails to”. So you can use the same kind of terminology to deliver something that sounds like a compliment, but for everyone in the know (which is most people by now) it’s clear that you deeply offended the person you are talking about.

  • Cattail@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    What you lack in evidence or convincing argument, you make up with conviction.

    • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      That’s the trick. End with the part that sounds nice

  • crapwittyname@feddit.uk
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    7 days ago

    I would agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

  • GladiusB@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    I fucked your cousin

    • Bgugi@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      😀😀😀…😠

  • Redfox8@mander.xyz
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    7 days ago

    You’re so vain, I bet you think this meme is about you.

  • Strawberry@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 days ago

    I can’t imagine a better day than one spent after your company.

  • YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today
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    7 days ago

    deleted by creator

  • officermike@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    wisdom has been chasing you, but you have always been faster

    • Digit@lemmy.wtf
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      7 days ago

      Faster than wisdom. Ha! Gotta remember that.

    • pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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      8 days ago

      Was that actually in the show? I don’t remember that one.

      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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        7 days ago

        I swear I remember pausing it to go “did he really just say that?!” But rewatching the pictured scene in S2E19 he’s speaking with Aang who would not be a worthy recipient of such a burn, and he doesn’t say such a thing to Zuko in that episode

      • tias@discuss.tchncs.de
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        8 days ago

        Don’t think so. It’s a Nigerian expression.

        • pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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          8 days ago

          There are some good ones:

          Unlike the stomach, the brain does not tell when it’s empty

        • antonymous_bosch69@feddit.org
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          7 days ago

          When someone finds a problem to every solution: They are the enemy of progress

          So many good ones in there thank you for sharing!

          • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            7 days ago

            Leftist infighting in a nutshell

  • NirodhaAvidya@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    Every moment I spend with you is better than the next.

    • nailingjello@piefed.zip
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      7 days ago

      Bravo, that one took the most thought to figure out it was backhanded.

    • v3r4@lemmy.org
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      8 days ago

      Really got me till the third thought xd

  • Diddlydee@feddit.uk
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    8 days ago

    Shakespeare had a banger.

    “I was going to challenge you to a battle of wits but I see you are unarmed.”

    I also like.

    “I could agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.”

    • TrackinDaKraken@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      “I could agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”

      A former co-worker got me with this one many years ago. I laughed out loud. I’ve never forgotten it.

    • CentipedeFarrier@piefed.social
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      8 days ago

      Got in a literal fistfight in middle school using that first one. Pretty sure they didn’t understand it, and lashed out from ignorance.

      • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        A duel with fists is still a duel

      • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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        7 days ago

        Did you win?

        • CentipedeFarrier@piefed.social
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          7 days ago

          Not technically, but they got expelled for it, so yes.

    • Matt The Horwood@lemmy.horwood.cloud
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      8 days ago

      I have a cup with the last line on it

  • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    You’re really at the top of the bell curve!

    • runner_g@piefed.blahaj.zone
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      8 days ago

      Your intelligence is at least on the top 95% of people.

      • Jankatarch@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        This took actually long to kick LMAO

        • bastion@feddit.nl
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          8 days ago

          me too, but mainly due to “on” rather than “in”.

          …I’d also replace “at least” with “possibly”.

          • Digit@lemmy.wtf
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            7 days ago

            probably

    • QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works
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      8 days ago

      so average? is that an insult

      • Digit@lemmy.wtf
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        7 days ago

        Yes

      • Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        It sounds like you’re calling them intelligent when you’re really saying they’re nothing special.

      • SeeMarkFly@lemmy.ml
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        For about half the people, yea.

        • thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          7 days ago

          more than a half, becasue those not in the half like to think that they are in the half

          • SeeMarkFly@lemmy.ml
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            7 days ago

            Good point, but now I’m confused about were I am on the curve.

      • luciferofastora@feddit.org
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        Most people like to feel like they’re better than most. Mediocrity is an insult to them.

        Blessed are the simpletons that never realise or just don’t give a fuck.

    • FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      You represent the 5th percentile really well!

  • borokov@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    You are hard to underestimate.

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