• solsangraal@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      52
      ·
      edit-2
      13 hours ago

      still adopt

      everyone i know who adopted went through absolute hell to be able to adopt. and those are straight couples, not living in a viciously anti-LGBTQ fascist state at the time

      • Zink@programming.dev
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        3 hours ago

        If you want a baby that’s relatively healthy, adoption can be an absolute nightmare. If anybody ever says to adoptive parents that they got their kid the “easy way,” it made them sound profoundly ignorant. It’s one of those life experiences where you learn about a whole shitty world that exists right under the surface that most people are blissfully unaware of. That includes adoption, fostering, child protective services, and all that crap.

        The only reason my wife and I have a biological kid is because the adoption process drove us to give it one more try with a new doctor in parallel. If we happened to adopt AND conceive, then fine. Instant family.

        But here we are with a 7 year old only child that’s biologically ours, not adopted. We might start fostering in the next few years though.

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        22
        ·
        11 hours ago

        Adoption also has some pretty serious horror stories about kids being treated like a commodity, and desperate mothers being manipulated into giving up kids. It’s a mess. It shouldn’t be for-profit.