Well sir, I have to say I do not like that prospect one bit.

He looks like he has no idea what he’s doing.

You guys ain’t seen nothin! Next month we’re dressing up a fat dude and shoving him down a chimney.

It was round before.

I break shit

I knew a guy who was, by all objective standards, a musical genius. Brilliant songwriter and lyricist, prolific, could master an instrument in weeks, took to sound production and engineering like a fish to water. In a sane world, he’d have easily flourished in the music business and possibly even made it big, as he had the drive. He had a razor sharp wit and a relentless sense of humor, and in his lucid moments, was a blast to be around.

Except he was an irredeemable and unapologetic pedophile. He had previously done ten years for making and distributing cp by the time I had met him. When I brought it up he vehemently defended himself and his vice as being completely normal and natural, and even bragged about his “work.” He insisted that he did nothing wrong and seemed to genuinely not understand why people didn’t accept it.

Shortly after we parted ways, I learned that he got caught again hoarding thousands of pictures and videos. He’s currently in prison and will spend the rest of his life there.

Honestly, I’m a classically trained musician, so I almost never put on classical music for background noise - I tune in and listen out of sheer habit.

I like Philip Glass. Yeah his name is a punchline but I find his sense of harmony and melody pleasant to listen to. I recommend his violin concerto. If you like vocal music I recommend renaissance motets (anything by Tomás Luis de Victoria for starters).

If you like a challenge take a listen to Stravinsky. If you wanna hear what it’s like to be a combat veteran try Xenakis.

Checkmate asexuals!

Psh! This is so easy give me that cash and you’ll never see me using that stupid 🚣 emo-

^fuck

Aged like fine Wisconsin cheddar.

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That…that’s just Derrick. I just talked to him at work this morning.

Worst. Lapdance. Ever.

I need to know that their baby Jesus is a Chucky doll. Because that would really improve my day.

I’ll Venmo him $1500 and beat out all these other chumps! They’ll see who the real A player is!

I stopped reading the news, and I block any and all feeds that relate to politics.

I know, I know…staying informed and all that. Except I’m hard pressed to name a news outlet that informs. What I see is so driven by the engagement metrics, rage baiting, if-it-bleeds-it-leads mentality that any modicum of facts or truth gets lost. Journalists seem to have forsaken their obligation to hold leaders accountable and have become complicit in the problems they’ve created.

I’m old, I’m jaded, and my activist days are far behind me. I’m just done with that shit. My own mental and physical health are my top priority at my age and switching off the never ending River of Doom has improved both.

Their government already does. They won’t notice.

Don’t worry, boy, I know the trick, and to you I’m going to show it.

If you want your boomerang to come back, well, first you’ve got to throw it.

Deus Ex

I know there’s a remaster, and I keep hearing that it’s ass. Can anyone confirm?

I could probably only go as far back as the industrial revolution.

I work in materials testing, mostly for automotive and aerospace, but I could probably put that to work helping design early steam engines and rail systems.

I also play trombone. That design was more or less finalized around that same time.