• Something Burger 🍔@jlai.lu
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    8 days ago

    If you are feeling good about your looks now,

    I’m not. It took me almost 4 years to have a normal BMI, yet I’m still super skinny, my face is still horrible, and I’m not even that good at weight lifting (bench-pressing 60kg is terrible).

    You have to talk to actual people.

    Who? And say what?

    This “advice” is always repeated by people like you, yet they can’t answer the most basic question about it.

    you can also tell any friends you have that you are looking to start dating, network.

    They know, but what can they do about it?

    dating apps

    I used several apps for 2 years and got nothing. Maybe a match every six months. Those apps are scams anyway; I know for a fact Tinder shadowbans accounts of people they deem too ugly. I did an experiment with a friend once; we both set our search perimeter to less than a kilometer. I could see her account, but she couldn’t see mine.

    you still have to reach out to people

    Again: who? Say what? I asked that question to several people over the years, both IRL and on Reddit/Lemmy, and NEVER got an answer.

    • RBWells@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      You are talking to us here, now. I know you do rock climbing and weight lifting. If you have friends, you talk to them too. It’s not different from that. You are doing it already. There’s not a formula.

      What friends can do is tell their friends you are a great guy and introduce you to other people. That’s what networking is, the same way you network computers, you network human relationships, by connecting them.