et tu, Sudo?

you should stage an insurrection.

please let me be the first facetious reply to your post. i’d say you should probably find God and start to pray.

if it serves the community, let’s please put all the jokes under here. it’s gonna be a long night

you started a great question, but then you got distracted.

i think that the BIG part that’s missing from the american eqution is actual fucking americans. y’all have been sat in your couches for so long that you don’t think you can actually stand for anything any more.

edit - you know, it’s a pretty small world here. you can reply instead of just downvoting me.

now i genuinely want to know where you draw the line. happy Easter.

Removed by mod

Inshallah

it’s unfortunate that you hate yourself and everyone else so much.

edit - congratulations, you’re the first and only person i’ve used the downvote button for. i hope you find love.

i love the image in my head when i think about a locust plague. i’ve been in tennessee during cicada season, so i can only imagine how much worse it would be. and cicadas are fucking gross. or maybe the raining frogs thing. ribbit, plop. ribbit, plop.

+1 for all of us who got the “how often” question and knew they couldn’t answer honestly.

edit - it’s “wondering”, not “wandering”. this is just my attempt to get you to kill me instead :P

i guess not. you can’t expect ALL my bad jokes to land, right?

i miss your old poop hair, sweetie

you’re gonna be REALLY grossed out when you find out what’s on your toothbrush…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTojTHjUckA

“it’s pronouned ni-JEAR, mister president.”

if you were TRULY horrible, you’d have posted this on truth social and the last part would have been “ENJOY!”

wise move

you said it horribly, but i think i’m picking up what you’re putting down.

but - for the sake of internet arguments - i have to pick out one sentence:

“The issue with modern society is we no longer let the idiots risk their lives and die.”

before i continue, are you sure you stand by that statement?

We voted for PLAGUE, y’all, not disease…

Pot: “oh, hey!”

Kettle: “didn’t think i’d see you here!”

you know, i haven’t heard a good suicide joke in a long, long time. what’s a good suicide joke that the kids are telling each other these days?

what’s a freudian slip? it’s when you mean you say “the other” but end up hanging yourself instead.

i wanna know what joke it was