I might be able to help here! Trying to save/convert someone can look a lot of different ways, but what almost never works is aggressively pursuing someone. The best way is to live by example and just engage in theological conversations when they come up, not by pushing but mainly by being curious and asking questions.
With this method it is quite easy to have friends from different belief systems. Everyone is on their own journey and sometimes it takes a lifetime, but being pushy is never a good option.
Totally agreed on this point! To have a fruitful theological conversation, all parties ideally would have set aside emotion and bias in order to pursue the truth. That is much easier said then done, but is something I think we should all strive for.
You have included a lot more here than I have the time to respond to sadly (hopefully someone else will) but I’ll respond to your last point:
I can’t say I’m a genuinely good person, but I would say that it comes down to respecting the persons individual autonomy. For example, if I have a friend who has a habit that I consider destructive, I wouldn’t join them in the habit, but my love for them shouldn’t change. I would be sad that the trajectory (in my opinion) would end with suffering but as their friend, I should lead by example in what I think is a better life and keep hoping that they see where I’m coming from. Plus, maybe they will convince me the other way on this or other topics!
My general life philosophy is to question everything. You will either end up with a more solid foundation in what you believe or you will have one of those awesome paradigm shattering events. Either way though, an open mind is required and I’d encourage you to keep listening to those you disagree with. You may be surprised!