I was a child who had been SA’d by an adult man. The adults around me told me to pray for forgiveness. I was 12.
Years later, I went to get a visitor’s pass to visit a friend at my old Christian school. They aggressively denied me entrance.
A lot of the social expectations of the time pressured young people to marry and have children as soon as they were out of school. You didn’t even have to like your partner– as long as you adhere to what is expected of you, otherwise you’ll bring shame onto your family. Being “othered” by your community could lead to losing jobs/promotions, social ostracization, bullying, etc.
So you do what is expected of you, even if it’s not what you want. You have regrets about the life you could have had. You get bitter. You get angry. You lash out at your wife and children, blaming them for why you couldn’t do something else, be somewhere else, or live the life you truly wanted without all of these “expectations”: work a job where you are miserable to make money to buy a home and support your new family, give up your hobbies, your friends, your time, even your identity… for what? To live a life you really didn’t even want?
Now you expect your children to do the same. Go through the same thing. Because it’s “tradition”. It’s just what you do! An artist?? You can’t support a family on that!! Why don’t you get a better job?? Why are you wasting your life by not making enough money?? You expect to raise a family on this salary?? You don’t want a family?? What are you, gay??? What will the neighbors think???
WHY ARE YOU NOT SACRIFICING YOUR FUTURE TO UPHOLD “THE NORM” LIKE I DID??? DO YOU THINK THAT YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME??? I WORKED MY ASS OFF TO KEEP A GOOD NAME AND LOOK NORMAL AND YOU WANT TO RUIN IT ALL??? MAKE LIKE ALL MY HARD WORK AND SACRIFICE WAS FOR NOTHING???
…
Some of them just can’t be happy unless you do what was expected of them, as well. Doesn’t matter how much things have changed. You need to sacrifice yourself in order to achieve. If you don’t… you’re “lazy”, “selfish”, and all that.
They’re angry because you get to make choices, while they were pressured into their life– a life they never wanted/weren’t prepared for.
I don’t like beer or most alcohol, so I have a drink maybe a few times per year.
One single alcohol is enough to get me tipsy, and we are similar in dimensions.
Have fun on your date!! (:
“Oki’s Weird Stories” is so very good.
Also “Shaun” and very much “Shanspeare” are great, if you’re looking for long-form content.
I keep thinking of more, so I’m just going to list them here:
AustinMcConnell, BobbyBroccoli, Dime Store Adventures, Fredrick Knudsen, Jenny Nicholson (already mentioned here many times!), Ahoy, Kid Leaves Stoop, Lady Emily, Sarah Z, Moon Channel, Paper Will, Soup Emporium.
Right?? I don’t even break 300 weekly. ):
EDIT: Sorry, Errer! I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad. It it definitely a good deal, tbf! For those who can afford it.
They’re trying to sow the seeds of outrage. Do not take the bait.
I knew about different bowl / seat shapes, but I never thought about the issues for folks who have a penis.
Very enlightening. Thank you for bringing it up! It’s very interesting.
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Oh, it’s pretty simple, really.
Had a friend who I realized would always complain about women in his movies, shows, video games, and whatever.
Turns out: he just hated women. Oh, he loved looking at “attractive” women and fucking women, mind you. But he just hated women. He didn’t even really grasp it and would deny it every time I to brought it up.
If a woman isn’t “hot” and/or willing to fuck them, the woman has no value. Anything they say or do also has no value if they’re not providing some kind of sexual stimulation for a man.
That’s why.
“Gravity Falls”! Great to watch with the kids, too. (:
Brings me joy, tbh.
Stop giving into social pressure to have children.
If you truly want to, have the resources, & you’re okay with making a lot of personal sacrifices, go for it.
But don’t do it just because it’s “expected of you” or anything else people say to try and guilt you into it. It will end up making everyone involved miserable.
Lemmy doesn’t worry me too much. If we start small, we don’t have to stress about it too much. I’ll focus more on issues when the community gets bigger.
I’ve modded trading communities before, too, so I have a bit of experience on what to look out for!
That could be interesting, but I am not tech-inclined enough to understand exactly what I am looking at when I click the link.
Oh dear, I’m not sure… but I added a standard link for anyone who is also having an issue with it.
Thank you for letting me know!
I’m teachin’ my kid about aquariums & fish, gardening & plants, virtual machines & old software, how to cook good foods, art and technology, card games, and life lessons about standing up for himself and others.
There’s still good in this world. And if it’s difficult to find, become the good in this world.
Marriage and children are not the ultimate marker for success, happiness, or maturity.
Please remember that.
I have hypohidrosis, so that might affect it?
Mosquitoes are not a big problem for me, and their bites do not make me itch.
My kid, however… mosquitoes just swarm him, and the poor thing swells up when he’s bitten.
Nah. Fearless Leader & Boris Badanov.