Tape cotton balls on them and use gloves.

Fuck a moose.

Do you use a McDonald’s spoon?

I turned up my music and ignored him because historically nothing good happens when someone gets out of their car in traffic and you bet your sweet ass I made sure our bumpers were almost touching next red light.

Oh my birthday isn’t for a couple more years.

What is a cake day?

Personally I’d like to see an extended sequence where Sam Porter Bridges slowly and sensually squishes a pound of ground mince between his toes.

I want to see it broken down into the fatal and non-fatal portions and also the mental health of the cars at the time of the crash.

On the other hand I had a guy get out of his Jaguar the other day and yell at me a while because I stopped too close to his bumper.

The Hillary Clinton smells like a harbor at low tide.

Get a bigger dildo you pussy.

Hunter Biden and Hillary Clinton.

Maybe instead we should probe Hunter Biden and Hilary Clinton.

Just like jesus taught.

You know what you did.

Ass.

That’s not proof.

Do you have any proof for any of those elections?

Can I send you a picture of my asshole and would you be able to divine the winning lottery numbers for me?

Made up dictionary.