• swelter_spark@reddthat.com
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      3 months ago

      To me it means be genuine vs being fake. Acting like someone you aren’t to get a partner only results in having a partner that you don’t have a real connection with, and who values you for qualities you don’t actually have.

    • ChexMax@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      This is a double edged sword. You shouldn’t put a ton of effort into your dating self if you’re not prepared to keep that up for the rest of your life, otherwise you’re just screwing your spouse. I’m so so glad I put very little effort into masking/ lying about who I am when I dated my spouse. I was just honest. I hate cooking. I’m hard to get ahold of/ don’t answer messages quickly. I don’t want to own a dog. Now that we’re 7 years in, I don’t have to let him down by saying a dog is too much housekeeping for me. I told him that on date 2. He on the other hand definitely presented his best foot, which was disappointing 5 years in when he could no longer keep it up. He’s messy, he apparently really wants a dog, and he also hates cooking, none of which i knew until long after we married.

    • meco03211@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      “Be yourself. And then make sure “yourself” is someone people want to be around.”

      • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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        3 months ago

        This one is hard because it also depends on what “you” (the person receiving this information) considers is good.

        I think about the manosphere and those frail babies are surrounded by ego cucks.